Sowing Seeds in the Young

Be slow to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.

When our youth pastor asked me to be a counselor for our youth camp two weeks ago I came with many reservations. After wrestling with God most of the night after I was asked, I asked Him to give me a peace. In the quiet hours of the morning it was like He was speaking to my heart that there was a divine purpose for me going. The verse above was the verse that He gave me for the week. It had been many years since I had walked along side of youth. I have been involved with kids, and women's ministries for the past 15 years. I decided that I would come with open hands and an open heart giving whatever I had to whomever he brought into my path. Almost instantly I felt a bond to all of the girls in my quad and almost an instant connection with my roommate and the girls in our small group, all 16 of them.

Many things happened during the week; distractions, diversions. Some things were just kids being kids, others were more serious. Each day we prayed for the kids feeling like God was going to do something big in the lives of the 42 kids that were entrusted into our care. There was a particular night when Ryan, our pastor was speaking. We had several people come through our outdoor seating area talking loudly, planes flying overhead, and just before the "feet washing ceremony" a black rat was threatening to run between the rows of where the students were sitting. I prayed for God to run him in a different direction. He heard and answered as the little fellow ran down into a vent in the cement. I even had a student who had food poisoning and became so sick that she had to be taken to urgent care. God's plans cannot be thwarted. Some would describe all of the events as a natural occurrence. I think it was all far more of a spiritual nature. When God has plans to do the miraculous, Satan LOVES to send distractions. God is greater, and praying God's Word and claiming victory in the name of Jesus and the blood that was shed on the cross, gives the power to overcome.

Sometimes events take place that are sad.  I witnessed our group being very loving and full of grace over the week that they were together. It is one thing for an adult to share the love of Jesus, not by their words but by deeds. It is a whole different story when it comes from a peer.

How privileged I felt to listen to the stories of the students on the last night of how God had transformed their life. That is what God does with His unconditional love and mercy regardless of what we say or do. Seeds were planted, seeds of God's love for us displayed through the life of a group of students. It is my prayer that God will continue to grow those seeds that were planted in the days to come through the friendships that were made in Malibu California. How proud I am of all the kids. Our youth group is different, closer. I pray that their lives will change our church and in the schools that they all represent!!! Never look down on those who are young. Their passion and zeal can touch the lives of those that we can't touch and they can strengthen the faith of those who have a deep and abiding love with Jesus!

Sitting in the Dark

All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:16

I often say my grandpa has nine lives. He has brushed death's door more than 6 times, his newest escape this past week. While we were in Indiana, he had a couple of strokes and a long stay in the hospital. I have held his hand and told him I loved him a thousand times, thinking it will be the last time I ever see him again on this side of heaven. He has told me over and over that he will hang on until my grandma is gone to heaven first. He doesn't want her to be left here alone.

I went to visit him tonight in the rehabilitation facility and the room was dark. He was lying in bed with the oxygen in his nose and a breathing treatment in his mouth. He was lying there so peaceful gazing straight ahead like he didn't even know I was there. He tried to speak with the tube in his mouth and his speech was slurred. I talked to him quietly and told him to just listen. My heart was filled with sadness hearing that he is in pain at times from the treatments he is going through and with so many complications that are taking place with his health I kept wondering why such a faithful servant has to endure so much suffering. Is it grandpa's will to stay or the fact that God knows exactly how many days he will remain on this earth? I keep wondering why God is allowing him to stay.

It has taken me a long time to be willing to let him go. He has been like a dad to me since my dad left us so many years ago. He has been such a faithful loving grandfather to my kids all of these years. Although I feel so much love for him, I now feel so much empathy for the fact that he is so weary and tired of being in pain physically and of carrying the burdens of my grandma who can't even remember our names. I pray daily now for God to take Him home. For when he leaves us He will feel no more pain, there will no longer be so many medicines, he will shed no more tears, nor will he be confined to a bed or a chair. He will gain a new body free from all his ailments and will never have to worry about any of us or anything for the rest of eternity. I am sure my dad will be waiting for him. I'm sure they will go fishing.

So tonight as I sat in the dark by his side, we sat in mostly silence. I sat on the edge of his bed as he stroked my hair. He's never done that before. I told him how much I loved him and that grandma will be Ok. 

I leave for a couple of weeks again on Monday. I don't know what will happen to grandpa tomorrow, or a week from now or a month from now. But I pray that his remaining days here will be few.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, surely the darkness will hide me, even the darkness will not be dark to you. The night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.  Psalm 139:7-12