Because we know that suffering produces perseverance, character; and character hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. Romans 5: 3-5
Life has a way of wearing us down at times. It seems that it is easier for me to bear the disappointments that happen to me, rather than rejections/failures/or mistakes happening to those who are closest to me. I looked back on the lives of my kids remembering the friends, competitions or games that they have lost, or positions that they tried out for and didn't make. The pain that they feel seems so much greater to us as parents because you don't want your kids to feel rejection or loss. I wonder if that is how God feels when we experience trials. I wonder if the pain is so much greater for Him, watching us struggle.
Many times, I think we would like to remove the hardships from the lives of those we love. We want them to be happy and carefree, never experiencing trials and pain. But this verse sheds light on the purpose of suffering; to produce perseverance and character. Sometimes even the youngest say, "Why did God allow me not to make the team, or why does God allow me to struggle so much with friends or why did my parents have to get a divorce?" Don't we as adults ask the same questions? Why did I have to lose my job? Why did I not get the job I wanted? Why is their life so easy and carefree and mine has so many struggles? Why do natural disasters happen? The questions come by the thousands. Doubts come like a dark cloud.
When rejection or failures come, we are faced with choices. Do I quit and just move on to someone or something else? Do I analyze where I can take ownership in the situation or maybe I have no control or responsibility whatsoever in the crisis? Do I really have a desire to excel and do I have what it takes to get there? If so, what steps do I need to achieve to reach my goal?
Can I see the bigger picture of what God is developing in me or those that I love through the struggles? If I remove the hardships in my loved one's life, will they ever grow? Is it really about winning the competition, job, relationship or is He just trying to teach me/them something through the process? Will they ever develop the tenacity to stick things out when life gets tough or do I just tell them to throw in the towel and later their life will get easier? My dad used to say, "Faith, Life is just not fair". As you get older you realize there will always be someone bigger, better, wiser, richer, more educated, more...Comparison is a no-win kind of game.
Are we intentional in teaching the younger generations to be the best that God created them to be, accepting their strengths and their weaknesses and working harder at times where they fall short. I don't think there are any short cuts to excellence. It doesn't happen by wishing, it happens by doing. We can be active participants or we can let the world pass us by, never pursuing our dreams and allow the fear of failure to order the steps of our future. I think the lesson is not so much in the rejection or the failures, but how we respond and how we pass on the torch to look forward instead of looking behind.
To embrace hardships instead of wishing them away is counter-intuitive to what we humanly desire. Yet, our thoughts are not God's thoughts. God wants us to use these times of suffering to encourage others, emphathize and mourn with them and accompany them on their journey. The most important thing we can do is to earnestly pray that God will use their trials for His good and mold them into who He wants them to be.
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